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Pregnancy Issues
Question:
Are all of the prophecies of the Old Testament applicable to Christians? In other words, it's like Isaiah 54 or 55 it talks about "widen your tent and make room you barren who have never bore a child." Wasn't that really for Israel? Is that still applicable for Christians today?
Answered on 10/13/06: It's a good point. Number one, the interpretation is for Israel. But the application applies to anyone who believes that they have a relationship with God because remember the reason why God gave the promises to Israel that He gave. It's because Israel was the new name given to Jacob and Jacob was the grandson of Abraham and Abraham is the one to which God made the promises to begin with. So, all the things that God ever does for Israel is because He made a covenant with Abraham. And in Galatians 3:29, the Bible says if we belong to Christ, then we are Abraham's seed and we are also joint-heirs with Jesus Christ and joint-heirs with Abraham as heirs of the promises that God made to Abraham.
So, you've got to remember that it didn't start with Israel. It started with Abraham and the only reason that Israel was blessed was because of their connection to Abraham. Well, we now have the opportunity and have the privilege to be a part of Abraham's blessing by claiming the rights of the child of God according to Galatians 3:29. So, yes, it applies to us if we truly believe that Jesus Christ is our Lord and Savior.
Question:
My question is about fertility drugs. My husband & I are trying to have a child and I’ve been diagnosed and told that basically, the only way that I can have a child is with a drug called Clomid which makes me ovulate. So, I’m wondering if it’s a lack of faith to go ahead and proceed with some type of fertility drug? Or do I just pray about it and just wait for something to happen?
Answered on 07/19/06: First of all, no, it is not a lack of faith on your part that you would consider taking fertility drugs. But you do need to make sure that you do not have a lack of knowledge also. You need to know what the side-effects and the consequences are of those drugs. And you need to make sure that you go into it with open eyes and an open mind. And you need to know what your expectations are going to be.
No, it’s not a lack of faith because even if you use the drugs, you just need to make sure that you put your faith and your trust is in God. “Whatever is not from faith is sin.” And the Bible says, “Let every man be convinced in his own mind. Have your faith unto yourself.” Or make sure that your faith is yours and you’re not trying to imitate somebody else’s or reproduce somebody else’s.
But if you truly believe that this is something that you and your husband are in agreement about, something that you guys desire, then that is not something that is against your faith and it’s not something that proves you lack faith. It actually proves that you do have faith, that even though you’ve been told that you can’t have children, you’re believing God that you can. And you’re willing to explore the opportunities and the possibilities of fertility drugs and those kinds of things. And that’s okay.
I encourage you and welcome you to explore those, but do that with knowledge. Make sure that you gather all the facts. Proverbs talks about gathering the information before you set out to accomplish something. Make sure that you know what you’re getting into and you know what the side-effects are and all of that and you’ve counted the cost according to Luke chapter 14. Before you build something, make sure you’ve counted the costs to make sure you have enough to build. And we’ll be praying for you to have success and to have great results in that regard.
Question:
What does the Bible have to say about contraceptives?
Answered on 05/11/06: We are responsible for giving birth to the next generation. God told Adam and Eve to be fruitful and multiply. That does not mean we should have as many babies as our physical bodies will allow because even if your physical body is capable of having 20 or 30 children, you’re emotional and financial and spiritual makeup is not necessarily capable of having that number of children. You need to look at it from a full perspective – spirit, soul, and body. Are you spiritually capable and emotionally capable to take care of those children and give them the affection and attention that they need?
Wholesome contraception is permissible. Remember, the Bible says, “All things are lawful but not all things are profitable.” Abortive contraceptives are inappropriate. It’s unscriptural to take the life that is already conceived. To prevent conception through contraceptives, however, is within the boundaries of our responsibilities. Just like if you were a farmer, you could prevent your harvest of green beans by not planting green bean seeds – or you could control the amount of harvest you bring in.
Children are different from green beans, but we are responsible to tend our garden and make sure that whatever life we bring into this world, we bring it to full term. We must be prepared to take care of that child emotionally, physically, and spiritually. If we are not prepared to do that, then we should make sure to use contraceptives. Remember, sex within a marriage is wholesome and pure. It’s not just for the purpose of procreation but for the purpose of agreement and unity, for the purpose of showing affection toward one another.
Question:
I am married and have two children. My husband wants more children, but I don’t think I do. Why do I feel guilty about not wanting more children? Is that God’s way of talking to me?
Answered on 04/25/06: You and your husband should read over Amos 3:3 together. That verse says, “How can two walk together unless they are in agreement?” One of the most important ingredients in a successful marriage is that the husband and wife be in agreement about the decisions they make. If one of them is not in agreement, then they need to table that situation until the Lord changes that person’s heart, or that person changes his or her mind, or until the other person changes his or her mind.
So you shouldn’t move forward with having more children until you are both in agreement. You shouldn’t move forward in getting a dog unless you are both in agreement. You shouldn’t move forward in selling your house and buying a new one unless you are both in agreement. You should not move forward with any big decision unless you are both in agreement.
God does not speak to us through guilt. Guilt is something that the devil wants us to feel because he never wants us to be happy about the choices we make. God, on the other hand, speaks through peace. It says in Psalm 85 that God speaks peace to his children. So, if you are feeling peace about having another child, then that is a good sign that God is speaking to you, but if you feel guilty about not having more, then that usually is not the Lord speaking to you.
Question:
I’m not getting any younger and I would like to have a child. I was married and divorced unfortunately. And I still would like to have a child. I was wondering what the Bible says about that.
Answered on 04/13/06: The Bible says in Psalm 128 that children are a gift from the Lord. They’re a reward, they’re a gift. And I think that’s the right answer that they’re a gift from God.
But I think what you or anybody, has to look at is what is the reason that I want to have a child? Do I have life experience and wisdom that I want to be able to give to that child so that their life can be even better than mine was? Or do I want a child because I’m lonely and I feel like that’ll make me complete or that’ll fulfill me or that will make me feel important or give me a sense of self-esteem? Those are wrong reasons to have a child.
A child should be the by-product of a loving relationship between two people in a marriage. But oftentimes, that’s not the case. Oftentimes people get divorced and the children are a by-product of a time when they were in love and a time when they did have the belief that children were a gift from God. I believe that every child that is born into this world is a gift from God, even if the parents get divorced, even if the child was a product of a relationship where the two people weren’t married. God wants that child in this earth anyway. It’s not God’s will that bad things happen, but it’s certainly God’s will that once that child is conceived, that that child be on this earth.
But as far as your situation goes, that child should have a father. You shouldn’t try to have a child without a father. If you believe that God wants you to have a child, then you should do it because you’re married and you want to have a child with somebody else.
Question:
I’ve lost four children in miscarriage. I was in the second trimesters of the pregnancies and so I know every sex of the child. The medical community has no answers on why the loss of my four children. Is there anything that can help me scripturally that why I wouldn’t have children or is there a reason why God wouldn’t want me to have children?
Answered on 04/04/06: First of all, I’m sorry to hear the loss of your children. But I do want to encourage you with a couple things. Number one, you are going to see four beautiful children in heaven. And I know that’s not much of a consolation, but it will be when you put things in perspective. Because life on this earth is very short. Life on this earth is dim in comparison to eternity and you will live forever with Jesus and with all of your children in heaven. I mean it’s going to be a beautiful time that you’re going to have with them. I know people have said that. I’m sure you encourage yourself with that. You may not be asking that, but I want you to be encouraged anyway. When you have had a miscarriage, you have successfully given birth to children into the kingdom of God and into the kingdom of heaven. You’re reward is going to be great because children are a reward from the Lord according to Psalm 126. You’re still going to be blessed by that reward in heaven.
Now, as to your question, is there a reason why God would not want you to have children? And the answer to that is absolutely not. It is not that God does not want you to have children. It is not that God is against you. It is not that you’re cursed. It is not that there is something wrong with your relationship with God or any of that. I think that we have to realize that there are physical challenges that different people have for different reasons that cause them to be susceptible to things that others are not susceptible to.
I know this is so minor in comparison to what’s happened to you, but some people have had sinus problems that they’ve had to fight. Some people have had cancer problems that they’ve had to fight. Some people have had other physical problems where their body has a tendency to lower its resistance to bringing forth a child to full term.
And all that you can say is, number one, you can stand on the Word of God in Galatians 3:13 which says, “Christ redeemed us from the curse of the law.” He redeemed us from the curse of the law. And one of the curses that is passed down because of Adam’s sin – not because of something that you did, but because of something Adam did – one of those curses is that mothers will have miscarriages. It’s not because you did something wrong. It’s because Adam did something wrong. And what you have to do is go to God and say, “Lord, I’m not guilty because of these miscarriages. I haven’t done something wrong to result in these miscarriages, but Adam did do something wrong resulting in these miscarriages. And I’m asking you to give me the divine ability to give birth to a child that is full term and to be able to enjoy that child here on this earth.” That’s what you have to say. That’s what you’ve got to go to God and ask Him. And I will agree with you and ask Him with you.
But don’t beat yourself up. Don’t question whether God is doing it because He is certainly not the cause of it. But it is something that passed down from Adam all the way to you. I’ve got some problems that Adam passed down to me that are different than yours. And you’ve got some problems that Adam passed down to you. And we’ve got to both go to Jesus and say, “Lord, deliver us.” Go to Him and say, “Father, I’m asking you to give divine protection over my womb, divine protection over my seed and over my body. And Lord, I’m asking you to give me divine conception in the name of Jesus, conception between my husband and me that will result in a child being brought to full term. I’m asking for this miracle. Lord, I thank you for these children that have already gone home to be with You. I praise you for them. And I now ask You for a child to be able to be conceived in my body all the way to full term. And Father, I declare that I am redeemed from the curse that Adam passed down to me. And I declare that I have the blessing of Abraham in my life and I can overcome this problem in the name of Jesus Christ. And I declare that I am pregnant and I’ll give birth to this next baby in the name of Jesus. Amen.” Go to God with it.
Question:
I was reading in scripture about Eve. We women have pain in child-bearing, but if we’re redeemed from the curse, how come we still have the pain?
Answered on 03/21/06: Well, number one, I believe that many women still have pain in childbirth because it’s hard work to give birth to a baby. You’re talking about a baby that is 8” in diameter, or whatever he is, coming out of a part of your body that is only 10 millimeters wide. So, there is a geometric reason why that’s difficult. But I don’t believe that it is necessary to have pain in childbirth. Why do people have pain still? Because many women are expecting pain. What there is going to be, guaranteed, in childbirth is labor. In other words, the word for pain in the Bible is not necessarily hurtful, excruciating pain, but it is the word labor. There is going to be work and effort and energy that goes into giving birth to that baby.
A lot of times, a doctor is preparing a woman to have pain. He’s letting her know, “You’re going to have pain. Brace yourself for the pain.” A lot of times, there’s fear involved in a woman giving birth to a child. And so, because she is afraid, she’s going to tense up and it’s going to be harder for her to push that baby out. Now, I’m not saying that there’s not pain associated at times and I’m not saying that a woman is not godly if she has pain in her childbirth. We just had a baby 4 months ago, and I had some pain giving birth to that baby. That was a big baby. That was an 11 lb. baby and that was not an easy thing for my wife to push that baby out. But it was labor. It was intensive. But really, it wasn’t necessarily excruciating pain.
But the fact is that a lot of times there’s pain because number one, women expect it. Number two, they’ve been told they’re going to have it. Number three, they’re afraid and their body tenses up. But a woman’s body was created by God to have a baby with as little effort as possible and you have to prepare yourself and brace yourself for the good rather that for the bad. We had a lady in our church that had a baby a few years ago that didn’t even have time to get to the hospital. The baby just popped right out. She had to have it at the fire department because it came out so fast. Each woman is different. Each woman’s body is different. Another reason maybe we have pain, we’re not eating the right foods. Maybe we’re not in the most healthy condition. So, we should be exercising before we get pregnant. And during our pregnancy, we should be taking care of our bodies, eating the right food. A healthy woman should give birth to a health baby relatively easily and quickly.
Question:
How does God look at someone if it was incest or it was rape and the child in the incest was young and they have an abortion and if a woman gets raped and she has an abortion?
Answered on 03/16/06: Well, first of all, let me tell you how God looks at anybody who has an abortion. He forgives. He forgives; He forgives; He forgives; He forgives; He forgives. And to those that really were bad and were really wrong and it wasn’t rape; He forgives. And those where it was incest; He forgives. And those where it was rape; He forgives. And those that got pregnant some other way and then got an abortion; He forgives. That’s how God views people who have had an abortion.
Now, does He want you to have one? No. But in a situation where there was incest and you ended up doing that, God forgives you. If you’re thinking about doing it, would He forgive you? Yes, of course He would. Who doesn’t sin without thinking about it first and he forgives every other sin.
So, if somebody has an abortion, knowing that they’re going to have one and knowing that it’s wrong, will God forgive them? Of course He will if they ask Him and they receive the forgiveness through the blood of Jesus. But if you know in your heart you shouldn’t do it and you have the strength to have that baby then have that baby and put that baby up for adoption or something else.
But do not think that God will send you to hell. If you have an abortion, do not think that God will condemn you for the rest of your life. You will not be outcast. You will not be a sinner. Would that be sin? Yes. Would that be taking the life of an innocent child? Yes. But is there forgiveness in Jesus Christ? Yes, there is. And is there hope? Yes, there is. But first get counseling before you do something like that and see if we can find a better way to take care of that baby if that baby is alive now.
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